There are many gay Christadelphians out there. You find us in ecclesias throughout the world, serving a God who loves us, sometimes serving an ecclesia that would hate us if they knew we were gay. You find us in the heart of the Christadelphian community, and on the edges. Sometimes you will find us are excluded from the community altogether. We all have different stories, we all have different struggles. The stories on this page are all real. They are stories of faithful Christadelphians, often painfully rejected by their ecclesias, but still walking towards the Kingdom.
I'll never leave Christadelphian teachings - as I believe in my heart that the teachings are true and correct in relation to the bible.
I am not a baptised Christadelphian for the simple reason that when the subject was eventually brought up and I said to my friend, "I am Gay," he responded with "You disappoint me." Then another person that I addressed as 'Brother,' wrote me a letter saying that I was not to call him a 'Brother,' just as he too would not address me as a 'Brother' as he had heard about my "decadent lifestyle," and my "pretending interest in the Holy Scriptures". As a man, I've not feigned interest but I knew deep-down that this response was typical (though I do not blame my friend; he was only standing by what he felt was right).
It's important that we judge not another but look at the 'INTENT' behind the words. His intent was not to hurt me but simply to express his theology as far as he felt was Scriptural.
Even though it was not his intent, I felt really hurt nonetheless, though one person that I spoke to at the Ecclesia said that he hadn't met a gay person like me, confessing that his own image of a 'Gay' person came from Christadelphian literature.
I still study Christadelphian teachings, do the Bible Readings and correspond with other Christadelphians (though not revealing anything about my private life), which sometimes does make me feel like a fake.
After spending 5 years seeing a Psychiatrist to "CURE" my "SICKNESS," I finally gave in. I have now been in a totally monogamous relationship with my partner for 16 years and have attempted to make my peace with Yahweh.
I'll never leave Christadelphian teachings - as I believe in my heart that the teachings are true and correct in relation to the bible.
As I told one of the brethren who, upon informing me that I could not hold to the Hope of Salvation, "God may not accept nor love me, but I do not need to stop loving God in turn."
Thanks for establishing this Website as I feel a little more in Fellowship with the Ecclesia.
When I was a young teenager, I developed the same way that regular teenagers do, except that I felt my desire for men ... I love God and know that I have to put my faith in him.
I was raised in the truth. Never being baptised, I started a long term relationship with my partner for about 8 years (at about age 21). At the end of that 8 years, I decided to end the relationship because I felt my love for God was greater than my desire for this person. I repented and was baptised. After about 2 years I became disillusioned by what I heard in Christadelphian circles. All the pamphlets and beliefs I heard coming out of the community were disturbing. I am very conservative and was raised in a family that advocates a strict belief in the word of God. I can honestly say however, that it was not something I chose to be. The actions I took in regard to my sexuality were my fault. When I was a young teenager, I developed the same way that regular teenagers do, except that I felt my desire for men. I prayed as a teenager to have different feelings but it never happened. After being in the truth for a few years, I left the truth and re-committed to my old partner for about 3 years. Since then, and due to my belief that he was aware of, he decided to follow a celibate life. I've read the pamphlets and heard the beliefs that certain Christian faiths have in regard to the subject and I know they are mistaken. One Christadelphian pamphlet even claims that we are being deceived by God. I don't believe that. I do believe that God has given man many challenges and birth defects, as the penalty of being sinful men. The twin studies and all the other information the author uses to back up his claim are not true. I have witnessed many twins where both twins were gay. I've also noticed families where cousins of the same family were gay. I've also noticed families where the middle child in a large family was gay, and his siblings were not. Also, all the junk about child molesters is also untrue. Just as many child molesters molest children who are of the opposite sex and just as many serial killers are heterosexual as homosexual. But this really doesn't matter. If people's faith is weakened by the fact that God may have created people who suffer from sexual birth defects then they should re-examine their faith. If we love him, we may have to be eunuchs for the Kingdom's sake. It's going to be hard but it may just be something he requires for a large percentage of the population who suffer from it. I love God and know that I have to put my faith in him.
My parents (and most of the adults in my extended family) were Christadelphian. I grew up attending a Christadelphian Sunday School and the Sunday evening lectures. I always loved the Bible, and I spent countless hours studying it: I looked for moral guidance, I looked for spiritual refreshment, I looked at the alleged contradictions, and I read the Bible for sheer joy as well. I was baptised while I was still at school.
But I also grew up gay. Even in the hormonal hell of puberty, I never had a sexual thought about a woman, but I had powerful thoughts about men that I now recognise as the beginnings of sexual feeling. I didn't recognise that I was gay until I was in my 20s, but starting in my teenage years I studied what the Bible says about same-sex relationships with a sublimated passion. I knew that the Bible utterly condemned same-sex relationships
One day my world collapsed. The feelings I had grew too powerful to ignore.
One day my world collapsed. The feelings I had grew too powerful to ignore. I realised that I was sexually attracted to men. I was relieved because I at last knew what these emotions inside me were. I was terrified because everything I knew about gay men was totally alien to me. I believed that gay men were decadent, promiscuous. I believed that no gay man had an interest in the Bible. My Bible study efforts increased. The words of Romans 1 were burned deep into my heart, as a spiritual talisman, the thing that made me a normal human being, not one of "them". I rebuilt my world and got on with my life.
I came to believe that being gay and faithful to Christ did not mean being celibate.
I read everything I could about homosexuality and the Bible, pleased that I understood it, feeling sorry for the deluded gay "Christians" who had to ignore parts of the Bible. Then my world fell apart again. I realised that gay Christians took the Bible as seriously as I did. I realised that my understanding of Bible teaching on this subject was flawed. I kept this information to myself, but I continually thought, read, and prayed about it. Gradually, and without telling anyone, I came to believe that being gay and faithful to Christ did not mean being celibate. I was able to build my world again.
I didn't want to rub anybodies nose in my sexuality, so I kept quiet about it, and what I believed. Through choice, I remained celibate. I worked hard in my ecclesia. I lead prayers, lead Sunday School classes, presided, exhorted. I did administrative work. I did pastoral work. I even made small but hopefully useful contributions to the wider Christadelphian community. My ecclesia was my family. One week I gave an exhortation that everyone enjoyed. The next week, my world collapsed again. Nobody in the ecclesia would look at me because one brother had been spreading rumours and lies about me. Far from being loved as a fellow Christadelphian, I was hated because I was gay. I left the Christadelphians.
I left the Christadelphians, but I did not leave Christ.
I left the Christadelphians, but I did not leave Christ. My faith has remained strong, and has actually become stronger as the years have passed. I fear not, because it is my Father's good pleasure to give us the Kingdom. I know that God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
I pray for the return of Christ, but I also pray that one day the Christadelphians will see the truth of Bible teaching on same-sex relationships, and my brothers and sisters will once more welcome me as I would now welcome them.
Although not written by a gay Christadelphian, this story has great insight into the way it feels to be a Gay Christadelphian, and how it feels to be a Christadelphian in a misunderstood minority group.
Reading through your site, I'm struck by the similarities of living in Christadelphia as a gay person, and living in Christadelphia, as I have, as a feminist.
I had to 'cover' my feminism as I struggled to conform.
I believed that the Christadelphian interpretation and application of the verses about women and their role was accurate, and if there was to be a place for me in the community, I had to 'cover' my feminism as I struggled to conform. Eventually, I came to the place where I decided that if the Christadelphians were right about women and their role, there was no God.
I think it's a similar story for a gay person in our community. If Christadelphians are right in their interpretation of the Bible, there are two possible conclusions: either something wrong with you at a basic level, or there is no God and the Bible was written by human inspiration.
Coming to the point where you see that the traditional Christadelphian position is not right can be wrenching. What else are we wrong about? What else in our 'first principles' are based on cultural perspective and bias and not honest interpretations of scripture?
Eventually, I see that there may be no place for me in Christadelphia. But now I feel more hopeful that there is still a place for me in God's plan.
I now have a wonderful partner in my lifeWhen I told my Christadelphian friend that I was interested in her, she fled immediately to the Church and reported me. Later that night, I received a phone call from the brethren. I was informed that I could not longer go to or participate in any thing to do with Christadelphians. I was crushed, for if they only knew that this was indeed aloud and true to me, they would accept me. Once again I tried to contact my old friend. She told me that she never wanted to see me again. Recently, however, I have joined a new group who accepts me as I am. I now have a wonderful partner in my life. I know that this is the right thing for me. To all the Christadelphians who said it was wrong, I now feel sorry for you and the way you have been so misled.
By Nathan Dickerson, a gay ex-Christadelphian, who left the community because of intolerance.
Having by this time firmly identified as gay and having worked with the gay community in the "outside world," I was appalled to see the people I had grown up with channel the tension into insults aimed at what they saw as the politically correct lightning rod of gays and lesbians. By the end of the week the teacher himself was telling gay jokes. It was after this encounter that I decided to preemptively reject Christadelphians before they rejected me.
Nathan's story is terrible. He was a faithful Christadelphian who was driven unnecessarily from the community. This shows how damaging intolerance can be. Even if the students and teacher had sincerely believed that it was wrong to be gay, there was no reason to tell "gay jokes". Brothers and sisters like Nathan should be welcomed by the Christadelphians, and it is my prayerful hope that this site will help to hasten the day when that happens.
Being Gay, Being Christadelphian is a gay Christadelphian blog on Xanga.com. It is more interactive than this site. Visitors can post comments, and the blogger is not the only gay Christadelphian who posts there. I was recently interviewed for that blog.
Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world
Matthew 25:34, NIV